He Thought I Was Being Good, I Was Just Getting Ready to leave Chapter 05

He Thought I Was Being Good, I Was Just Getting Ready to leave Chapter 05

I thought a man as rotten as Harrison would be easy to leave. Just be with him, feel the pain, and then leave without looking back.

But rotten people are the most dangerous when they’re not rotten enough, when they leave you just a little bit of real feeling.

I didn’t know if he was naturally good at sweet-talking or if he treated me differently.

He’d bought me cars. Given me houses. Countless designer gifts—it was routine.

I told him I grew up with strict parents. There were so many things I’d never experienced, never watched a sunrise, never chased a sunset.

He pulled me out of bed at four in the morning, drove over an hour, and stood with me on a mountaintop waiting for dawn.

I mentioned once while traveling for work that I’d left my childhood stuffed animal at home and couldn’t sleep.

He was overseas at the time. I could hear him take a drag of his cigarette and laugh over the phone. “Oh yeah? And what am I supposed to do about that?”

Two hours later, his private jet touched down on the hotel rooftop. The flight crew had tied a pretty bow around my old stuffed animal and wished me good night.

I knew this wasn’t love. Besides, a man like Harrison would never understand how to truly love someone.

So I indulged myself and made excuses for him.

But still, I found myself searching for signs in the small moments.

I tried to prove that, for even a fraction of a second, he had felt what I felt.

A few days ago, near the end of a long, exhausting night between the sheets, I was half-asleep when I suddenly felt that he wasn’t wearing anything.

I jolted awake and pushed against his chest. “You didn’t put anything on?”

Harrison pinched my earlobe and played dumb. “Forgot. If it happens, just keep it. You think I can’t afford a kid?”

For a second, something soft flickered in his eyes, like he actually saw a future there.

“We can’t…” I pushed him away and reached for the pill.

We couldn’t have a baby. We weren’t going to last. What would a child even mean?

Harrison’s face went dark, like he was deliberately trying to pick a fight with me on this. He grabbed my hand and swept the pills one by one into the toilet.

“Ella, if I find out you’re taking those things, you’re in trouble.”

My heart skipped a beat. Just for a moment.

And then I was stone-cold sober again.

I waited until Harrison wasn’t looking, and took the pill anyway.

I woke from my daze to silence. Harrison hadn’t come home.

My phone buzzed. I picked up.

My mom was back to her usual speech. “I can’t sleep when I think about you…”

She didn’t know about Harrison. In her eyes, I was already past the age where a woman should be married.

“If you don’t start looking now, in a few more years you won’t have any good options left.”

“Mrs. Bennett’s son is in town. Just meet him once. It’s not like it’ll kill you…”

Back in high school, she was so afraid I’d date early she hacked my hair into a mess.

Now she was terrified I’d never get married at all. She’d probably post my profile on a dating site if she could.

I sighed and cut her off. “Fine. I’ll meet him.”

“Just getting to know him, that’s all. If you go and…” She trailed off, stunned. “What did you say?”

“I said I’ll meet him,” I repeated.

I needed a reason, something to push me over the edge, a reason to finally and completely leave Harrison.